were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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