im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Randomize
