At least make sure they are 18
Why
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize