It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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