I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
she peed on how many people?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
