Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize