You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
