I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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