you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
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Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
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Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
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