I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You took a bar mat shot.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
