Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
She needs sedatives and a leash
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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