Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
