Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
