She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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