That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
