Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
