I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
