Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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