no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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