Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
