FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
