she pinky promised me she was 18
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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