Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
