Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
