I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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