Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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