There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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