We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
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