I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
