New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
