All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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