ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
