I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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