You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
