did you get engaged???
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Randomize
