Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
We almost ended up sober because of u!!