Texts From Last Night

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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.

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  (307): i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian. http://tfl.nu/fuqa
  Replies (46) Good night (4556) Bad night (1216)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.

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  (918): I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did. http://tfl.nu/i39w
  Replies (13) Good night (3056) Bad night (1389)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"

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  (601): Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing" http://tfl.nu/jpe9
  Replies (6) Good night (1196) Bad night (3588)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.

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  (513): sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces. http://tfl.nu/5w4e
  Replies (16) Good night (6931) Bad night (947)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  ...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.

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  (507): ...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back. http://tfl.nu/m5i6
  Replies (6) Good night (983) Bad night (3241)
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  (530): View more from California

  for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.

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  (530): for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs. http://tfl.nu/et1w
  Replies (16) Good night (3685) Bad night (1035)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?

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  (425): Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet? http://tfl.nu/nobj
  Replies (5) Good night (3126) Bad night (1021)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  She looks like a junkie muppet...awful

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  (907): She looks like a junkie muppet...awful http://tfl.nu/ahtl
  Replies (5) Good night (882) Bad night (1712)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"

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  (404): This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome" http://tfl.nu/7ky1
  Replies (5) Good night (2819) Bad night (668)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue

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  (541): I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue http://tfl.nu/me08
  Replies (7) Good night (986) Bad night (1307)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  her dad gauges his nipple piercings.

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  (417): her dad gauges his nipple piercings. http://tfl.nu/b294
  Replies (8) Good night (489) Bad night (1667)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.

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  (260): The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible. http://tfl.nu/nj7i
  Replies (2) Good night (615) Bad night (790)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.

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  (434): It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually. http://tfl.nu/a0fb
  Replies (2) Good night (558) Bad night (326)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.

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  (770): Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it. http://tfl.nu/r24g
  Replies (6) Good night (447) Bad night (729)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.

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  (520): I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick. http://tfl.nu/pc6z
  Replies (0) Good night (286) Bad night (470)

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