i don't plan on having that self control this summer
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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