Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
