we have pet lesbian snakes
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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