Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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