He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
