I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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