my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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