____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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