Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
