That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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