"it" just moved
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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