How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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