For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
