honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
